Sad Music, Dark Literature and Positive Thoughts 2

Art helps me to reconcile my past whilst my goals push me into the future

Category Archives: Family Life

The Arms of Sorrow

If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got – Henry Ford

I was amazed (probably, I shouldn’t have been) that on the Internet this quote is attributed to other people besides Henry Ford. One business website attributes the quote to Albert Einstein, for instance.

Anyway, I digress.

I think last year I mentioned that February and March is a sad time for me and I end up taking time off work with illness.  In February 2015 I was absent from work with sickness for four days and the same thing happened again in March last year.

March 2009 was when my father passed away, whilst I lost contact with someone special to me during March 2014.  February is connected to that same person for a special reason which I won’t go into right now.

In November last year, I planned ahead and booked some time off.  My leave started Thursday last week and I returned to work yesterday.  It meant that I would be home on my own to grasp time for myself to think about the two people I mentioned in the previous paragraph.

I was pretty ineffectual as a human being last weekend.  Sunday saw me biting Gloria’s head off at the slightest thing.

During my week of leave from work, I had chance to sort a few things out around the house; those DIY (Do It Yourself) items that I have been putting off for a number of months.

One thing was to sort out a box of paperwork that I kept ignoring week after week for…I don’t know how many months.  Some of the post in the box was my late father’s which dated back as far as 1984.  That box is no longer making the place look untidy, so I scored a success there.

Seeing that post and realising how quick each task I completed was, I lamented how I have been putting things off.  If I keep on putting things off, I will never get to finish my studying for that IT exam, for example.

This week – and every week – I have a choice.  If I carry on as before, I know what will happen.  I will die without making an impression on the world.

For all of the anger in my heart at the evil out there, I will have helped to change nothing.  At present, my ideals are not resulting in enough action.

The realisation came to me of how scared I am to be bold.

I am sure that if I were to die today, there are people that will remember me as someone with a kind heart.  I’m not mocking that, that is fantastic.

However, I want to look down from heaven and be able to see at least one person living a better life because of something that I have done whilst still alive.  I want to admire myself.  I hope that expression isn’t too clumsy.

 

The Hardest Thing To Accept

The Serenity Prayer – Reinhold Niebuhr

God, give us grace to accept with serenity
the things that cannot be changed,
Courage to change the things
which should be changed,
and the Wisdom to distinguish
the one from the other.

Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time,
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace,
Taking, as Jesus did,
This sinful world as it is,
Not as I would have it,
Trusting that You will make all things right,
If I surrender to Your will,
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life,
And supremely happy with You forever in the next.
Amen.

Have you ever witnessed someone you love or care deeply about continually do something that even they acknowledge as stupid?  They continue no matter how much you try to reason with them.

reinhold_niebuhr

Reinhold Niebuhr

Most of you know what I’m talking about before I even spell it out, I reckon.

My twenty five year old daughter (no longer my stepdaughter – Yasmin calls me Dad, nowadays) has a professional occupation, her own car, rents her own place, is very attractive, has a good figure…well, she’d have no problem finding a new man if she wanted to.

So why is Yasmin still keeping with her boyfriend who even she describes as very immature.  None of her friends have good words to say about him but there he still is in her life.

I won’t tell her how to live her life.  I don’t believe that controlling another person’s life is an act of love.  I have gently advised her that she is possibly wasting a big chunk of her life as she would not be confident that he would have sufficient empathy to help one of their children suffering an emotional crisis at, say, thirteen years old.  I won’t tell her what to do but let her consider whether she is just wasting her time.

Yes, it is so hard to give others the latitude to live their own lives.  However, this is what decent human beings do for the ones that they love and care about.

I was thinking of The Serenity Prayer penned by Reinhold Niebuhr this week.

With Yasmin, I can sleep easy knowing that she isn’t the victim of domestic violence or some other barbaric practice, but is only putting herself through unnecessary mental pain.

But what of those who cannot help themselves?  What of those school aged girls who are first raped and then forced to marry their rapists under pressure from their families?  What of the child soldiers forced to shoot their own parents?  What of the innocent civilians maimed by previously unexploded cluster bombs?  What of those victims of the modern slave trade?

There are millions of girls, boys, women and men who are living through everyday hell with no means to save themselves.  This has always been true of this World.  However, I find it more the stuff of nightmares nowadays as we are living in the twenty first century.

All I can do is to change the things that I can change and accept that I cannot rescue the World.  If my actions can relieve the suffering of just one person, then my life will have been worth a great deal.

If half of the population of the United Kingdom joined me in this then the lives of 30 million people around the World will have been improved forever.  And what if half the inhabitants of each relatively rich and free western country improved the life of one other person?  How much better the world would be.

On my own I cannot change the world  A multitude of willing if meagre efforts from the millions also living in the same society as me can save the oppressed in this World.

On the plus side for Yasmin, her boyfriend did spoil her with several gifts for her birthday.  If he can be a bit more considerate of other people’s feelings then he too will be improving the world around him.

There is hope for this.  He isn’t a vindictive or bad person.  Hopefully, he’ll wake up one morning and just curse himself for acting before thinking of other people’s feelings.  I do actually think he is capable of that.

Mediocracy?

Some of you may be happy to read this blog post.  Others will be either disappointed or indifferent to the news that I am returning to WordPress, Google+ and Twitter.

You might ask the question, ‘What has happened to me over the last half a year whilst I have been mostly absent from social media?’

Well, a lot has happened last year.  I won’t go into the details of everything that has happened as this will reveal many personal details about myself and a few people that are close to me.

I will no doubt mention things in the next few weeks that will touch on a few of the issues that I have faced, but please forgive the non-explicit nature of any explanations.

My good friend Ebely has in recent months enquired after me via Twitter and email.  I mentioned to her about a bit of a health problem that I was having.  The symptoms that I described to her were psychosomatic – or, at least, they were partly due to how ragged I have felt in my head and body.

But, no matter.  I’ve re-jigged my diet and routine a bit to help with these things.  The result is that I am feeling better than I was.

I suspect that I’ve missed loads of exciting news from all of my friends.  I will be reading through every outstanding blog post from each of the blogs that I follow.  This will take a little while so please bear with me.

I hope that you all will be happy to see me back.  If not, then I know that you will have good reasons which may in part be due to your own personal crisis.

And so, to the weekend…

The next few days will prove eventful, although I cannot thank myself for any of this action.

Tomorrow afternoon is the funeral of my half-sister’s mother.  She was a Polish lady who married my late father soon after the Second World War.

I don’t know the story, so I cannot share it with you.  I’ll tell you what I know.

After War was declared, Britain internally evacuated school children away from city centres as there was uncertainty how soon Germans would start bombing British towns.

My father was at school when the Second World War broke out and was evacuated to a place called Liss.  He loved to preach at the United Reformed Church in Liss as he had fond childhood memories of the village.  I remember driving him there on several Sunday mornings.  At that time I drove a white Proton Persona.

On D-Day plus three, my father’s best friend was killed in action.  My father ended up in Germany at the end of the War and, so I was told, spoke German in the accent of one of the nearby villages so well that some German residents thought that he was a native of this nearby village.  He also remained a pen friend of one of the German POWs for life.

Soon after returning to England, he married a Polish woman that he had met.  Tomorrow, this lady will be laid to rest.  She was a pleasant woman with whom to speak, which Gloria will testify to.

On Friday night I am on driving-Yasmin-and-her-friends-to-town-on-their-night-out duty.  I haven’t done that for a few months.

And on Sunday, my nephew Otis is running in the London Marathon for charity.

Selection_013

A screen grab of my nephew’s fundraising page

He hasn’t yet hit his fundraising target, unfortunately, but he is still raring to run and raise what money he can for a charity that has grabbed a place in his heart.

He has run a marathon before so knows what to expect.

At the moment, Otis is sleeping on a camp bed in my mother’s bungalow.  It wasn’t the best idea for him to stay on where he had been lodging.  My Mum wanted to put him up to help him save for a deposit on a better place hence his address for a couple of weeks has been the same as his grandmother’s.

She worries about him a lot although I am certain that he’s more capable than she thinks.  She probably worries about him because he never raises his voice or show any upset or anger with anyone, no matter what happens.  I think that she in concerned that he’s too easily bullied.

He will be moving to his new place in the next few days.

So, an active weekend without me doing too much effort myself.

Life can be mundane

This week has been one of those many weeks when nothing noteworthy seemed to happen.  A week when the normal routine kicks in and the enjoyment of life jumps out of the window.  A week full of days that morph into each other.  You surely know the kind of weeks that I’m talking about.  One of those weeks when each day is just the routine that you get up, you work, you eat, and then you go to sleep.  Before you know it, the week has slipped past.

It’s the mundane weeks that really test your character.  I like to remember that character is continuing to do those things that you ought to do even when the initial excitement has ended.Dull_and_Boring

A few things have happened this week.  Like, I telephoned a call centre yesterday morning and moaned about my direct debit payment last week.  Hmmm…oh yes, during the week I booked my car’s MOT test as well.  Oh, and Gloria’s work friend’s daughter invited us to her twenty-first birthday meal one Saturday in May.

Actually, I could make up some amazing post about any of those three things if I wanted to exaggerate the truth of what happened.

I could talk about my car.  It’s so old that it still has a tape player rather than a CD player.  My first car didn’t even have a radio.  I love sunroofs and my car has one.  It is a manually operated sunroof but I love it.

Did I ever tell you about when I bought the car?  I telephoned this number and found myself in a rather seedy situation.  The dealer was down a side alley near a train station.  Walking down the alley which had a taxi rank sign from years ago when this was a different business, I was greeted by a padlocked gate and a massive dog.  The barking dog was then joined by a rather unsettling tough guy…

No, I haven’t told you that story?  Well, that’s another blog post I guess…

 

beautifulkindofthoughts

Colours of different thoughts

savedandblessedblog.wordpress.com/

Faith, Poetry, inspiration, everyday life, spiritual, Love, Christian, Bible

arne´s comfy couch

Aktuelle Themen

Basketball Greatness

Home of Basketball News and Updates

BENGELLENE

Love That All Matters, Who Emphasize and Rejuvenate Our Passion

Embracing Authenticity

"Don't be ashamed of your story it will inspire others!"

culinary wish

It's all about food

simple Ula

I want to be rich. Rich in love, rich in health, rich in laughter, rich in adventure and rich in knowledge. You?

London Wlogger

Walking blogger exploring London's hidden gems, sights and history!

Educational, Inspirational Moral Issues And The Christian Journey

Creation awaits eagerly for your manifestation therefore know your worth!

word and silence

poetry & prose by Tim Miller

fenlo3399@gmail.com

fenlo3399@gmail.com

bijoux alisoa

Inspired Journalist

La Audacia de Aquiles

"El Mundo Visible es Sólo un Pretexto" / "The Visible World is Just a Pretext".-

Daily (w)rite

A DAILY RITUAL OF WRITING

lovekira1996

Some things can't be said out loud. So, I write them down. :)

fonzandcancer blogging to encourage.

Sharing my cancer journey with you.

Chape Personal Trainer

Dreams don´t work unless you do

Dancing with Mosquitoes

Rendezvous with the beauties of life

Real Bold Truth

Genuine Exchange In Christian Experiences

brianfrances's Blog

These are amusing short stories about events like "Walking the dog" or "Manufacturing Jewellery"

RainingReviews

Welcome to the World of Books and Movies

Side by Side

A tidbit of my thoughts!

Alluring n Young

Finding Her Voice; Finding happiness.

Girls Not Brides

The untold misery of child marriages

Tales of Chinese Cooking

A Repertoire of Recipes

SPLASHED!!!

Think. Feel. Create

GoanImports.com

Learn about Goa Culture, Foods and Recipes

Lilua12

Glimpses of Heaven in an everyday life

The Spryte's blog

meandering thoughts, ideas and opinions

H82typ's Blog

Just another WordPress.com site

Tùy phong đáo thử

Nhai biên ấp thạch xưng tri kỷ - Đài lý tầm thi kiến cố nhân

The Fish Tank

Under Construction

A Sneak Peek On Things I Like

Batman, Random Things & Geek Stuff

Novielle's Blog

What's on my Mind???

coisart's canvas

playing with paint...slinging ink...

der Wandersmann

Mostly photos, with an occasional garrulous ramble

Fuenteovejuna did it

peering into the underworld

Chrysopeleia

The story of my dreams coming true

subacati

This WordPress.com site is the cat’s pajamas

The WordPress.com Blog

The latest news on WordPress.com and the WordPress community.